God Save the Queen

Leave the gun. Take the cannoli.
- The Godfather

"Let's go girls. Strap on your stilletos."

Tl, Nins, Chinx, Jill, Kamil. We are assassins extraordinaire and tonight we have a job.

Inside the LV suitcases are guns of all shapes and sizes, grenades, knives, swords, balisongs. All well and good but where are the clothes? Surely our clothes have to be flashier than our weapons. It's in the rules! How ridiculous to make us go to war dressed like civilians.

God save the Queen Kamil.

"My conquistador, always conquering. Where are the clothes? Why are you tying me up my right hand?"

"So you can assemble this (complex weapon) blindfolded AND with just one hand."

"Surely that's not necessary," says Chinx alarmed.

"Paputukin lang naman nya yan ng papuputukin diba? Kailangan ba talaga yan?" says Jill, ever so smoothly.

"Sige na Kamil, makisakay ka na para makaalis na tayo," says TL the practical.

"Kamil, remember to teach me how to tie that knot," says Nins already thinking a naughty sex thought.

Right. So blindfolded and with one hand tied behind me I assemble this weapon that looks -- voila! -- like an honest to goodness gun. Papuputukin ko lang naman ng papuputukin but will this look good on me?

I look in the mirror. It does look good on me. But... perhaps...

He senses my apprehension. My conquistador. Always conquering. Conquering the world in the name of his queen.

"What is it? What's the problem? Oh Kamil, we don't have time. What is it now?"

I study myself in the mirror. I practice assassin posses. "Oh I love it. But the question is... Does this come in pink?"